07.21.2021
An Unworthy Opponent
“Nope, no.
It’s plain to say—
These poachers get worse
day after day.
They get one star
For their advertising
But I can’t even rate
This trap-disguising.”
07.20.2021
“The Bird’s Best Friend”
My little chicks are getting picky
They say they won’t eat worms because they’re “icky”
I think what’s needed is a bit more zest
To reduce the complaints here within my nest
So I’m referencing “The Bird’s Best Friend”
To bring these protests to an end
I’m sure these sauces, bakes, and stews
My little ones will not refuse
And if they do I wash my wings
Small robins are not queens and kings!
07.19.2021
The Expedient Yak
Most have heard the story
Of the famed Pony Express
And how it delivered mail
All the way across the West
But much less celebrated
And so much lesser-known
Is the wonderful Expedient Yak
Which covered a more northern zone
It was a one-man-one-yak outfit
A simple, grass-roots team
They bore all kinds of mail
Over every mountain and each stream
A unique postal service
It never quite caught on
Email and Twitter developed
And the Expedient Yak was gone
Some say they saw them serving
Soft-serve at a spot in Maine
Other rumors have them crooning
Ballads on an eastbound train
So if you’ve never heard this telling
Of the Golden Age of mail
Please stayed tuned to PBS
In hopes they’ll tell the tale
07.16.2021
A Submarine Tea
In a secret location
In the great Northern Sea
There’s an ex-Navy submarine
Where two friends meet for tea
They meet there on Wednesdays
In the midst of the week
To maintain their close friendship
Which they count as unique
See, they met long ago
At the edge of a glade
A majestic elk grazing
A cloaked hunter in shade
The two were apart
Their paths set opposed
The hunter and hunted
Or so they supposed
Till both of them startled
By the sound of a growl
That rose behind hunter
From a wolf on the prowl
The hunter he froze
As he heard the low sound
He was quite disadvantaged
In his spot on the ground
In the split second moment
Which fell next at that spot
The man knew he’d soon perish
But no, he did not
For rushing between
The predator and prey
The valiant elk king
Came charging away
He bent his crown down
To let the wolf know
That he’d come no further
No further, he’d go
The elk offered protection
To the one who had sought
To take him as trophy
With a single cold shot
As wolf, it retreated
And the man caught his breath
The day’s hunts abated
Two postponements of death
And it was that same day
That a friendship sprang forth
And a tea-time on Wednesdays
In a sea way up north
07.15.2021
A Protocol for Potatoes
I am a member
Of the Royalty Guard
And I keep castles safe
Plus the gate and the yard
Nobody in
And nobody out
Unless they’ve permission
For their business about
I’m ready for anything
I stand at the ready
And there’re very few things
That can make me unsteady
But today is a day
When I’m quite unprepared
Nowhere in my training
Was a protocol shared
I’ve flipped through the manual
And no, I can’t find it
For what I’m to do
With a potato that’s GIANT
I was making my rounds
And as I turned on my heel
There this spud I beheld
No, it couldn’t be real
But it is and it’s huge
A gargantuan tater
And it’s not in the manual
So I’ll leave it till later
Or maybe I’d better
Ring my Captain of Sentry
To see whether or not
This potato gets entry