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08.13.2021

A Process for Perfect T-shirts

I’ve found the perfect process

To make t-shirts fit just right

For they always seem to come too big

Or fit me far too tight

And the plan is really simple

Though it does have several parts

But the first is most important

So that is where I’ll start

I first begin by ordering

A size fifty-extra-large

They ship them in from Portugal

On an ocean-going barge

And after I’ve unpackaged it

I spray it down with water

At first the temperature is cold

Though I gradually make it hotter

Then when the shirt is fully doused

It’s ironed most profusely

Till shrinking to the just right size

Doesn’t hang upon me loosely

I know for many reasons

It’s a practice I should quit

But it’s the only way I’ve found

To make my t-shirts fit